Show Up ~ Rant

You want to know what is great about awareness? The actual moment that you know you are aware.



Awareness...it’s an odd thing that we all search for at different times of our lives…higher purpose, simply to have purpose, guidance from the divine.

But then there is an instant when we hear our inner voice, actually hear it speak, both audible and in our gut at the same time…a truth.

Next, the hard part…What do you do with a truth from yourself? Worse yet, a gut truth that will nag at you until you do the damn thing that is revealed (nagging) to you.

You say your prayers then you go to work.

Deliver whatever it is. Be present.

Show up.

P.S.
I wrote this on Facebook yesterday but I feel it needs to be preserved here.

~ I am an advocate for being pulled together for a common “purpose”, not pushed together by a common “argument”.

Man-Spa

This past Saturday I went to a man-spa for a haircut.

Man-spa is not its real name, its real name is a French word that I cannot pronounce with funny symbols above specific letters in its name. I have been to this man-spa before for other types of man-spa treatments but I am no longer secure enough in my manliness to have these other treatments done to me in a public place whose name I cannot enunciate.

Sitting in the man-spa is a very manly experience for the man who wishes to feel pretty. They offer you lattés, cappuccinos and water that comes in oddly shaped bottles that look expensive. The waiting room smells of musk and leather, I think it might be burning candles. The magazine collection is a mixture of sports, cars, and man-style fashion magazines; think Vanity Fair for men. Vanity Fair is a magazine that men and women can both read, right? Nonetheless I pick up a copy of Esquire magazine and read an article about how Robert Downy Jr. is the second best actor in America. Never did find out who number one was.

The receptionist tells me that my stylist, Jess, will be right out. Jess? An androgynous, transgendered name…that always makes me uncomfortable. Not that I care if a man or woman cuts my hair; its the not knowing of who will walk around the corner to meet me. Ok Jess is a girl, a good-looking non-confusing gender of a woman. Don’t judge me, its a man-spa, I am here for the experience.

I explain the haircut that I want to Jess. It’s a mixture of Buddhist monk meets Brad Pitt haircut in Mr. & Mrs. Smith. Jess calls it a buzz cut and places a number four guard on her clippers and within ten minutes I can see the white dome of my skull.

Next, the man-spa treatments that I am secure enough to treat myself to--scalp message with a hot towel wrapped around my face. The next three minutes with Jess are blissful.

Coffee Shop

Yesterday I was waiting in a coffee shop for a photographer friend of mine. You probably think that I am the type of person who would spend time in coffee shops. I am not but I should…

Top 5 reasons why I do fit the “coffee shop” stereotype:

1) I drink coffee.
2) I like to write in public places to steal ideas.
3) I have that scruffy-beard-artist-look-thing going for me.
4) Reading books in public places makes me feel cool. Got to feed the ego.
5) I like listening to music by white men with sad lyrics while playing acoustic guitar.

Top 5 Conversations overheard in a coffee shop:

1) Two stripper Moms trying to decide on daycare for their daughters
2) 80 year old man searching for his birth parents
3) Why fried bologna sandwiches are the best; seriously this was a great conversation to eavesdrop on.
4) Anything about religion, especially why other religions are wrong.
5) Isn’t John Craig extremely good looking?

4am & a Thought

Woke up early, again, very early 4am. Coffee is extra good at 4am and the computer screen is bright at 4am, painfully bright.

Been thinking about getting a hand grinder for coffee beans. There is something about brewing a cup of coffee that appeals to me.

Finished reading “Change By Design” by Tim Brown last night. The book ended with a quote by Tom Kelly that has sparked a thought in me.

“Innovation begins with an eye.” ~ that is the photographers job; to create something new and different. A photograph starts with a thought.

For 17 years I have been working in photography and in that time I have never felt like an inclusive photographer. I am not techie, nor do I subscribe to any photo magazines and have no interest in the latest gear. For me, my passion and effort has been pulled towards the compositional aspects of art. I think of myself as “I create therefore I am”, type of artist….my ego just exploded, sorry for the mess.

Nature. I am drawn to nature as a teacher of the arts. I figure that nature has a 4.5 billion-year headstart; maybe there is something that nature can teach me.

This is my compositional process: read books and go for walks in the woods, feel philosophical about myself…good thing egos are self-regenerating; I am on my third one today. Is this the correct process for photographers? No idea but it is the correct process for me.

Working on a post for next week: “Slow Photography Movement”. Raining outside, going to read a book by the fire.